2003-12-21 - 12:25 a.m.

Everyday I take Duke for a walk. We walk through our backyard, through the school parking lot and into the woods. There are paths worn into the woods. One main circle that is rutted and clear from years of other walkers using it on a daily basis. There are smaller less clear paths with no ruts in them that get used more rarely. And there are the woods themselves with no paths except for those that Duke and I forge out for ourselves.

For the past several months, since the layoff and the unemployment cheques, I have been searching for my own path. A new path since the previous one clearly was just going to lead me in a circle. At some points, I was desperate for any path, even if it would lead me to the edge of the woods and into traffic.

It does seem that I have found one.

And as I walked Duke today I started thinking about a few things. I always figured I would sort of forge my own path. But the truth is that that is a lot of hard work. A lot. It is always time consuming and doesn't always put my energy where it needs to be.

So I have walked the main path with my previous job and fallen into the woods to make my own way and now I have found a smaller path with less walkers and more fallen logs that is right for me. And if I ever need to dash into the woods to find my way on my own, I can stick close enough to my little path so that I no longer lose my way and I have a place to return to when the trip becomes too tiring or cold or cluttered.

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